


wonderwall

by unbreakable_groundriot



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angel Crowley, Crowley as Crawly, Garden of Eden, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Other: See Story Notes, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-07-31 12:55:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 8,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20115439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unbreakable_groundriot/pseuds/unbreakable_groundriot
Summary: "Is this seat taken?"The angel before him does not flinch at the sudden press of a flaming sword to his neck or the sight of six, massive wings postured and ready to attack. He smiles and holds up delicate, long-fingered hands to show he is unarmed. Aziraphale sighs. His shoulders relax and suddenly he's a two-winged angel wringing his hands nervously rather than a six-winged beast with a sword. "Oh my... Apologies. It's instinct I think."A fic of snapshots of life before time.





	1. Chapter 1

"Is this seat taken?"

The angel before him does not flinch at the sudden press of a flaming sword to his neck or the sight of six, massive wings postured and ready to attack. He smiles and holds up delicate, long-fingered hands to show he is unarmed. Aziraphale sighs. His shoulders relax and suddenly he's a two-winged angel wringing his hands nervously rather than a six-winged beast with a sword. "Oh my... Apologies. It's instinct I think."

The other angel tips his head and his pretty yellow eyes rake up and down Aziraphale's body. "No harm done. You did singe a little hair." The angel has mahogany hair in shining messy waves halfway down his back. He pouts and fiddles with a braid that has been singed. A quick swipe of his hand sees it back in perfect condition.

Aziraphale touches his own lily-white curls subconsciously. He's never been this close to one of the...Common angels. He'd been visited several times by the various archangels when they gave him orders or his rations of manna, but the other angels gave him wide berth. The Eastern Gate was lonely. Sometimes he walked to the length of his wall, which he never quite realized was one continuous circle, and never saw another guardian.

If he was the Angel of the Eastern Gate then where were the other three? Ah... Better not to question.

"Ah... What was it that you wanted?"  
"I asked if this seat was taken." The angel waves his hand at the very empty wall around them. "Can I sit with you...?"  
"Aziraphale."  
"Can I sit with you, Aziraphale?"

He hesitates. He was commanded to guard the gate. Nothing said he couldn't have a chat and keep watch for...Whatever it was he was meant to watch for, right? "I suppose, but I must remain vigilant." He sets his shoulders as if to prove his point.

The other angel chuckles. He shakes his head fondly and then settles down with his legs dangling over the edge of the wall. All around them is an endless desert of white sand. Above them an endless, cloudless blue sky. Behind them, the garden is verdant green.

"Bit hot." The angel's nose curls. He leans back on his arms and presses his wings against his back to prevent the sun from heating them.

"You... Get used to it I suppose." Was it hot? He'd never noticed. He plays with the hilt of his sword where it rests at his hip. "Do you have a name?" He tries to sound confident but he knows he comes off as shy. He can't help it!

"Crawly." The angel speaks in such a louche and relaxed manner. "Not fond of it, I think. I was thinking of changing it to Crowley. Less squirmy. Not sure yet."

"Crawly." Aziraphale repeats. "... You can't change your name. She gave it to you!" The very idea!

Crawly laughs loud and light. "Oh, angel, you are cute."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I noted that in a long shot in the show [Eden](https://cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/20/590x/secondary/good-omens-locations-1893515.webp?r=1559244992348) is not square and it has no gates. No other angels are mentioned in the Bible or in the show as guarding it. 
> 
> Also, manna is what God gave the Israelites to eat when they wandered the desert. Crowley mentions the food in Heaven hasn't been very good so I'm making the assumption that they eat.


	2. Chapter 2

Crawly begins to visit quite often, or what Aziraphale thinks is quite often. Time moves differently on Earth. There is day and there is night, but he can't really measure the passage of time. To him, the sun always looks to be in the same place and then the stars come out. Crawly comes several times during the daytime and less at night. He's rather nice to talk to and for some reason he makes Aziraphale's cheeks go all pink and hot.

"Morning, angel."  
Crawly lands on the wall with a brief rush of wind from his white wings. He delicately arranges his hair as if it had really been mussed by the flight. It's not braided this time and cascades down his back much longer than before. Oh... To be so willing to change.

No.

He had been given the body the Almighty wanted him to have.

He tries not to smile too eagerly, but it never works. He's nearest the large waterfall today. Eden is massive and green and never close enough for him. Some of the treetops reached the walls of the garden and if he laid on his belly and stretched out he could barely brush the green leaves. "The most wonderful thing happened today!"

Crawly settles onto the wall in a lazy sprawl. He had even taken a nap in the sun once. Aziraphale hadn't understood the concept, but it had been nice to sit quietly with someone. "Oh?"

"Yes! A bird landed on the wall." He gestured vaguely to the edge of the wall that faced the garden. "It was so lovely! It was the brightest blue I've ever seen!" Not that he'd seen much blue beyond the sky and the faraway water. "It made these noises at me and," he sighs, "it was gorgeous. You should have been here."

Crawly smiles in the way that makes Aziraphale's cheeks burn. "Is that so? I think that one called those parrots." He jerks his head toward the garden where Adam wanders. He does not have a mate yet.

"Parrot." He parrots. "Well, it was lovely." He sinks down to sit cross-legged next to the other angel.

"Did you touch it? Suppose it would just fly away." Crawly's long red hair drapes down and pools onto thedusty white wall.

"Oh no no." Aziraphale feels his heart twinge, but he didn't understand the feeling. "I killed it. It tried to fly out of the garden. That's not allowed."

Crawly's easy smile fades. "Oh...Angel...That's..." Aziraphale doesn't understand why he's suddenly up and on his feet in one fluid motion.  
"I forgot I had something to do." His hand hesitates over Aziraphale's head. He drops his hand to pet at soft curls. His smile is soft, and weak and holding something odd. "I'll come back later, angel." He's gone in one great flap of his wings.

The wall is very lonely, but Aziraphale can't stop smiling and touching his hair.


	3. Chapter 3

Aziraphale finds himself perking up at the sound of wings nearby. His excitement very quickly fades when he finds a small, white bird flung down at his feet.

"You are not taking your duties seriously, Aziraphale."

The archangels visit occasionally. They bring him orders and food. Michael sometimes stays to chat about keeping up his training exercises and Gabriel stays to talk about the garden. Raphael has never visited and Uriel is terse. She never stays. She looks angry. "I found that creature in the sky, Aziraphale. You were commanded to guard the gate against all things." She lands on delicate feet. Her skin shimmers in the bright sun and he averts his eyes out of respect and shame.

"I would have noticed." He interjects only to be harshly shushed. He squats down and picks up the poor creature. He taps its chest to no avail. Its neck is broken. "I swear, Archangel Uriel."

Uriel stands with her hands behind her back. Her wings are postured high and proud. "You have been...fraternizing with that red haired angel. Don't think we haven't noticed." The bird crumbles in Aziraphale's hands like dust. "You have a job to do, Aziraphale. You must focus and keep the garden safe." She curls his lip and tosses Aziraphale a cloth sack. He catches it easily. "Your rations. Half rations." She rolls her eyes at the disappointed look on his face. "Watch yourself Aziraphale. That angel whose company you allow is not to be trusted."

She's gone and Aziraphale looks mournfully into the half filled sack of round, white seeds. The Almighty gave them manna and the angels had taken to making the seeds into delicious, sweet bread. He was usually given several loaves every so often. He'd never been given just the raw manna.

He thinks of the bird for what is probably hours. The sun starts to fade and the sky goes pink and orange and yellow. Much heavier feet land next to him. He hasn't moved since Uriel had left him. He felt awful for failing at his job and hunger gnaws at his belly.

"What's got you so grey?" Crawly's hair is short now. It's threaded with silver and gold threads that shimmer in the fading light. "Angel? Aziraphale."

He jumps out of his stupor with a gasp. The bag of manna tumbles out of his hand and spills over the walking surface of the wall. It skitters across the stone and the wind carries much of it over the side and down into the white sand below. The white orbs that do not fall away melt away like morning dew in the hot sun.

"Oh..." He bites his lip. Everything happens for a reason.

"Angel, what's wrong?" He feels a warm, firm hand on his back between his wings. Crawly... He shouldn't here and yet he can't bring himself to tell him to leave.

"I was scolded by Uriel. She gave me my rations but... I didn't know how to make bread." He can hear the shake in his voice. He's never been scolded before. He was a good angel. He did his job. He didn't ask questions.

"Bastards..." Crawly shakes his head. The threads in his hair catch the light like stars. "Wait here, angel." He moves to stand but Aziraphale grabs his arm a hair too tightly.

"Will you stay? Please." Something wet is in his eyes and his heart hurts. It's frightening. "I-If it wouldn't be a bother. Oh, it would be a bother, wouldn't it? I'm sorry." He releases the other angel. He still holds the now empty bag and folds his hands in his lap. He stares at the white stone.

"Angel... I'll stay." Crawly sits so much closer to him. "Come here. Put your head here." There's a gentle tug and Aziraphale finds his cheek pressed against a bony shoulder. Crawly's arms go around him and hold him close.

His first hug.

"It's alright, angel. You're feeling sad. It's okay."  
"I don't like feeling sad." He whispers. His fingers curl into the slightly rougher material Crawly's robes are made of. "I don't like it at all..."


	4. Chapter 4

“A bird? You’re making a bird?”  
“Yeah? What of it? You made that straight line and called it art.”

He takes his time to craft each star in his hand. Size and shape were just options and currently, he was so much larger than any star. He inspects the orb in his hand and crushes it. Not good enough. Another slowly forms and he rolls it into a perfect circle.

Uriel rolled her eyes. She pushes a planet into place and then fiddles to get the color just right. “What’s the point? That human never even looks up here.”

“Point of pride,” He replies with a grin that’s all teeth and brotherly sass. “I like looking at it all. It’s nice to have something recognizable.” The final, brightest star is set into place. Centuries and centuries from now the Greeks would call it Altair and the formation would be known as Aquila. For now, it has no name.

* * *

Aziraphale loves the night time the most. The garden is dark and Adam sleeps. Most of the animals go quiet but he can hear faint sounds that only exist at night. There is less activity outside of the wall, but the sky... The sky is what he loves the most.

The swirl of so many colors he can’t name mesmerize him. Stars twinkle in the distance and the half-built moon looms massive above him. It grows before his eyes as it's put together like a puzzle.

He lays back with his wings stretched for comfort. Guarding the garden is easiest at night and he feels less lonely. Nothing tries to get into the garden other than a few angels who tended the plants while Adam slept. Nothing ever tried to get out either. It's freezing cold at night but his sword, though dimmed, keeps him somewhat warm. The stars keep him company.

He hums a meaningless tune he'd once heard from the angels that flew passed. He traces shapes in the sky that he finds among the stars. He imagines he sees a star that hadn't been there before.


	5. Chapter 5

"That is not how one grooms one's wings."

Crawly lands delicately on his toes behind Aziraphale. The blonde has one of his lily-white wings awkwardly spread around himself. They hurt something awful and more than one feather is out of place or even broken. One of his alula feathers sticks out awkwardly and a slow trickle of golden blood trickles down to the very tip of his wing. "Oh! Crawly!" He practically squeaks. He tries to hide his wings as if Crawly isn't circling him like a bird of prey. "I was just...Not doing that! How are you? It's been some time! Your hair is lovely!" He wipes at his eyes quickly but only succeeds in smearing golden blood and wet tears over his cheeks.

Crawly sits behind him without ceremony. His hair is shoulder length during this visit and shines brilliantly in the sun. "No sense trying to distract me, angel. What in Heaven happened to you? I've not been gone that long." A pause. "You have silver threads. I never noticed."

Aziraphale flinches as a shredded feather is gently stroked. Magic slowly restores it to perfection again. He pulls his knees to his chest and rests his chin there. "I fell." He feels as ashamed as he sounds. "I was flying and I went too far."

He hears the frown in Crawly's voice. "We can't go too far, angel. Did you try to fly into the desert? We can't go out there."

Silence.

"Aziraphale?"  
"Up. I flew too high and then I fell down. I scraped the side of the wall." He gasps as a feather is suddenly pulled from his skin. His body relaxes right away as the throbbing pain abates. He sees the broken alula feather set aside. It had been the cause of his bleeding and it is soaked in blood. Crawly is quiet for a long while. He works slowly and heals each wound and straightens each feather. "You should have been able to fly up." He brushes his long, thin fingers through the bloody feathers and the gold dissolves and floats away in the wind.

"I'm not supposed to leave the garden. I was being foolish." His voice wavers. "I just wanted to stretch my wings. I never get to fly. I just wanted to..." He hiccups out a sob. He finds himself pulled carefully against Crawly's chest. The other angel presses a gentle kiss to his forehead.  
"Cry it out, angel. You're alright now. I've made you beautiful again. This is all going to be a funny story you tell everyone." He whispers in his hear and somehow Aziraphale believes him.

* * *

"You spend too much time with that fledgling." Lucifer lounges languidly against a lovely layer of clouds that line the Firmament of Heaven. He nibbles on a loaf of manna and tosses Crawly a chunk. He's a gorgeous creature of shining blonde hair and brown eyes that seem to shimmer with gold in the right lighting. Around them, other angels relax and chat. A few sleep and more than a few are coupled off sitting close together and touching hands and wings and lips.

Crawly considers the manna in his hand. He takes a bite to give himself more time to speak. It doesn't taste as sweet today or maybe he's just tired of eating the same thing time after time. "He's lonely. Scared." He takes another bite. "It's like torture, really. He can't leave that fucking wall. Told me he can take three steps into the sand before the pain strikes him down." He tosses the chunk to another angel. The dark-skinned creature snatches it out of the air and splits it with a pale-haired one.

"He is meant to guard the gate." Lucifer shrugs.  
"There is no gate. He can't see it. He walks that damned wall again and again and there's not fucking gate! I've flown around the damned thing myself!"  
"Calm yourself, brother." The morningstar warns gently.  
"It's not right. I want to know why he's there. There's nothing in the desert. We are the only ones allowed in and out of the garden. What is there to guard?" Crowley sits up properly. "And why must he be alone?"

Lucifer twirls his hair as he thinks the questions over. "But does he question it?"  
"... No. He thinks it's all part of the bloody plan."

  
The archangel smiles. "Then perhaps you should teach him."


	6. Chapter 6

"Centaur? No. You're just making that one up."

They lay on their bellies, shoulders barely brushing, as Crawly draws on the white stone. He had called the black, stone-like substance in his hand charcoal. It stained his hands and cheeks where he's brushed them. The marks it leaves on the wall are worrying, but Crawly assures him he can remove it.

"Of course I'm making it up. This is all made up, angel." Crawly's tone is playfully derisive. "Imagine, yeah? Half man. Half horse. How do you think it would wear a robe?"  
Aziraphale watches Crawly's delicate fingers draw out the creature he's described. He's seen a horse before. He's seen a man before. Trying to imagine the two combined just won't happen in his brain. The image only appears when he sees the drawing. Suddenly he can imagine the strange creature drawing back its spear to attack. He smiles wide. His wings stretch out from excitement, but he quickly shifts their position to make it seem like he was just trying to shade them from the sun.

"Can I try?" He hides the lower half of his face in his bent elbow. Crawly likes when he looks at him through thick, dark lashes. He always says yes to things he makes that face. 

Crawly smiles. He hasn't been visiting as much recently but the visits have been longer. It's a trade Aziraphale is more than willing to make. "Don't suppose it could hurt. Give me your hand."

He takes Aziraphale's hand and gently folds his fingers to properly hold the charcoal. Both of their hands are stained black now. He can't find it in his heart to care about the mess. "Now just press it against the stone. Gently or it will break." Crawly keeps his hand over Aziraphale's. It's warm and soft and makes his cheeks do that weird thing where they get all hot.

"I'm sure I can do it." One of his legs hangs lazily in the air as he manages a crooked line. He feels something hot in his chest. "You made this look easy. Why is it easy for you?" He knows he's being fussy, but he can't get the image in his head to translate to his hand. A bird. He wants to draw a bird but crooked, jagged lines are all he can manage.

"It takes practice, angel." Crawly strokes a thumb over his cheek. Charcoal smears there, but neither notice it. "I was made to draw, but it still took time for me to perfect the craft." His hand doesn't leave Aziraphale's face. The blonde's eyes wander to pink lips as Crawly's eyes search over his face for something unknown. He hasn't had much experience with other angels. Crawly is the only common angel he's ever met. He's also the only angel who has ever made his face do the hot thing and his heart do the bumpy thing. His breathing picks up a little and he notes that Crawly's lips part slightly.

"Aziraphale."

The charcoal in his hand explodes and a spear is slammed into the drawing of the centaur. Michael stands on the razor-sharp barb of the spearhead as though she was weightless. Her armor gleams so brightly in the sun that Aziraphale is forced to look away. Crawly stares up at her defiantly.

"Go."

Crawly bares his teeth at her. "Why, pray tell, should I?" He stands and his wings posture high and spread to make himself seem larger.  
"J-Just go." Aziraphale cowers. He can feel so much anger and it makes him want to cry. He hated crying. He wished he'd never learned how.  
"Angel..."

"Go." Michael repeats. "Look what you're doing to him. Leave to your duties."

Long, slender fingers card through his hair smearing the white curls with black. "I'm sorry, angel. I didn't mean for anything to scare you." Crawly manages to get Aziraphale to look at him. "It's okay. We've talked about this. It's okay to cry." He brushes his thumb over his cheek again and the charcoal floats away on the wind. The wall and their skin are as pure as they had been before. He feels a bare brush of lips against his forehead before Crawly launches himself over the side of the wall and into the garden.

"Cheeky bastard." Michael murmurs. She turns her attention to Aziraphale. "You are shirking your duties again. This will not go unpunished, Aziraphale."

  
He isn't allowed to watch the stars that night. Instead, he finds himself being forced through drill after drill. The flame of his sword and the light of Michael's spear block out even the hint of light from the sky.

By the time the sun returns he's can no longer tell if he's crying or sweating.


	7. Chapter 7

Aziraphale stares up at the sun with a determined look twisting his brows. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that every angel who passed him was allowed to fly. He could flutter along the border of the wall, but he could not fly over the garden or beyond the walls. Flying higher than a few hundred feet caused great pains.

It wasn't fair.

He unfurls his extra four wings and launches himself up with all of the force the muscles of his back can muster. He grits his teeth hard and pushes and pushes. Then the pain hits. His lower left wing twinges and burns. Then the top right cramps and he's falling. This isn't the first time. He'd thought that maybe using all of his god given wings would give him the power to break the invisible barrier.

He closes his eyes and prepares to hit the sand below when he's suddenly scooped into strong arms. The scent of freshly made manna and fire fills his nose. "Crawly?"

The lanky angel lands with a stumble that nearly drops him. "What do you think you're doing?" He sets Aziraphale down. His wings posture high and threatening. "The last time you pulled that stunt you broke a blood feather! What if I hadn't been here? You could have been hurt!" His yellow eyes are bright with anger that dims quickly. Aziraphale can't stop the tears that spring to his blue eyes. All everyone ever does is tell him what he can't do. All they ever do it yell at him. He clenches his hands into fists at his sides and grinds his teeth.

"Ah...Damn...Angel...Look at me...Please?" The pleading tone doesn't work. Aziraphale takes a shaky, hiccuping breath as tears fall faster and fatter. Even Crawly made demands. Crawly was like the others.

"I wanted to fly. It's not fair that you all get to fly!" His wings are sore now but it doesn't stop them from posturing just as raised as Crawly's. Six wings were more intimidating than two. "It's not fair that you all get to have friends! You get to go where you want whenever you want! It's not fair that I'm stuck here!" He hiccups again. "It's not fair..."

Crawly pulls him into a warm hug. He doesn't have any rage left to fight it. His wings slowly disappear leaving his two, common wings behind. Crawly rubs his back between those wings. "I know, angel. I know it's not fair. I wish I could tell you why this is happening... But I can't. I can only be here for you when I can."

* * *

"Why is he up there anyway?"  
Lucifer's hands pause briefly as he thinks of his answer. Crawly sits with his back to him as the morningstar braids his hair. "I don't know. She's expecting something I imagine. That creature is too stupid to leave the garden and nothing ever tries to get out. I'm sure it's all part of the plan." Crawly can practically hear him roll his eyes.

"It's sick. They treat him like he's less than everyone else. I watched Michael force him through drills last night. The entire night. What are they planning?"

Lucifer doesn't pause again. "She won't answer us. You know she won't. For all we know she put that angel on the wall to amuse herself. The others follow orders blindly. They keep him there."

Crawly draws idly on the Firmament with his finger. "I almost kissed him. He's so... Good? He's just so good. He's so damned genuine in everything he says and does."  
"It sounds like you're in love." Lucifer tugs him back against his chest with a playful grin. "In love with that dandelion, eh? I didn't know you had it in you!" He leans into Crawly's ear. "You should tell him. It might make the suffering more bearable."

Crawly doesn't fight the hold. He leans back with all of his weight. "I don't think I could say it."  
"Then show it, star painter."

* * *

Only three of the four Archangels ever visit. He'd asked Crawly once and he said that no one ever saw Raphael. He was too busy with his stars.

Gabriel is the most enjoyable of the three who do visit. He's loud and unintentionally brash and very, very friendly. He seems to be the type of angel who wants everyone to like him but isn't sure how to go around doing that.

"Thank you." Aziraphale takes his loaf of manna with a small smile. The bread just didn't taste very good anymore. It was horribly boring eating the same things again and again.  
"Of course! I'm sure you get hungry up here." Gabriel stands on the edge of the wall and peers down into Eden. "Such a long way down. Do you ever spot him?"

Aziraphale picks at the loaf. "Hm? Adam? Sometimes he comes near the wall. I usually send something to scare him off. He's not meant to come so close."  
Gabriel steps back and pats Aziraphale's back too hard. His smile is broad and genuine. "You're doing a wonderful job! I've been told that you've been a little...distracted, but that's alright! Nothing has gone wrong. I know I'm happy."  
He smiles weakly. "Thank you, sir. I try to do as commanded."  
"That's what I like to hear!"


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter briefly deals with the idea that angels "born" at the same time consider themselves siblings. They do not consider other angels to be siblings or relatives. As such this chapter mentions an in-universe incestuous relationship. It's not graphic beyond kissing and is not meant to be romanticized.

"Will you tell me about the angel on the wall, little brother?" Lucifer strokes the other angel's cheek. His eyes are half-lidded and his smile calm.  
"I'm not sure what you want to know," Gabriel whispers. He tips his head to chase the hand as it pulls away. He's always so sweet and genuine and desperate to please. 

"Why is he there?" He leans in and presses a gentle kiss to the corner of Gabriel's mouth. His hand settles on the slightly shorter angel's hip and he uses it to pull their bodies flush together. He hears the little hitch in his brother's breath.

The Archangels had, for all intents and purposes, been created at the exact same moment. They were seconds apart with Lucifer being the eldest and Raphael being the youngest. Gabriel was sort of a middle child, but he was favored and doted on by his elder siblings. Lucifer was especially fond of him... Perhaps too fond.

Among the angels, those created together called themselves brothers and sisters. Love was encouraged among their kind, but it was, as it would be for humans so many years later, taboo to find love among your brother and sisters.

Gabriel loops his arms around Lucifer's shoulders and twirls a bit on blonde hair. "He's there to guard the gate. That's his job."

Lucifer slides his hand through a slit in the back of Gabriel's white and purple robe. The violet eyed angel has a smattering of gems along his back like freckles. They shimmer shades of purple when shown the light and they are sensitive to the touch and touch he does. He presses a lazy, wet kiss to the crook of Gabriel's shoulder where his robe exposes soft skin. "You aren't telling me anything useful, sweet thing. There is no gate. The garden is surrounded by a solid wall." His voice is gentle but his tone is chastising.

Gabriel's knees go a little weak. Lucifer holds his weight easily with his free hand. He whimpers out something less than appropriate. "A test. It's a test."

Lucifer smiles against his skin. The robe falls with a single tug of the purple belt holding it together. "And what could She possibly be testing?"  
"Loyalty."

* * *

Aziraphale squats down and lets a handful of off-white sand fall onto the wall. He pats it down carefully. He stands and steps off of the wall and lands with a soft thump. He picks up another handful of sand before launching himself back up the wall. Three more trips gives him a respectable pile of sand. He sits back onto his behind and pats the sand into a roughly square shape.

It's been some time since he's seen another angel. Crawly hadn't returned and that made his heartache. Perhaps he had been scared off forever. He didn't doubt the red haired angel had been punished as well.

He sighs as he starts to draw his finger through the sand. He carefully poked several holes into the sand pile and connected them with shaky lines. He saw many shapes in the stars now that the sky was growing more full of them. He was certainly not artist, but he thought his drawing looked like a centaur...Sort of. He cocked his head and squinted. Yes. A centaur made from stars. He thought he saw a bird there once and there was one that looked like a human wearing a belt. Crawly's drawing had opened his mind to the idea that perhaps he could just...pretend. He could imagine he wasn't stuck all alone on a never ending wall.

A sudden gust of wind threatens to blow his sand mound away. He curls his wings around the little drawing and is pleased to find it intact when he unfurls them.

"What do you have there, angel?"

"Crawly!" He can't stop the hopeful, excited tone of voice. He stands quickly and dusts off his hands. Crawly circles him fully before peering down at his drawing.

"Trying to steal my job, eh?" He couches down to get a better look. "This is nice. Looks familiar."  
Aziraphale frets with his hands. "I tried to make a centaur... But I'm not very good at drawing."

Crawly stands properly. His hair is especially short today and a few feathers dangle near his ear. The look is quite striking. "Oh come on. I'll teach you. The buzzkills are busy today." He holds out his hand where a piece of charcoal suddenly appears. The blonde angel swallows, hesitates, and then takes it.

Much later, once Crawly has flown off and the half-built moon has risen, Aziraphale watches eleven stars appear in the sky. Tears fall freely from his eyes as he recognizes the shape of his centaur.


	9. Chapter 9

Aziraphale doesn't know the word for what they were doing, but he likes it very much. There is a nearly weightless Crawly in his lap and delicate hands cupping his cheeks. Their mouths and tongues and teeth meet with desperate touches.

Crawly parts their lips with a desperate moan. Aziraphale wanted to hear it again and again. "We have to stop." He presses wet kisses to the blonde's mouth even as he speaks.

Aziraphale grips Crawly's robes to try and hold him in place. They'd landed in this position on an impulse on Aziraphale's part. The stars had moved him to tears and his instincts had moved him to press his mouth to Crawly's.

"I don't want to stop... Whatever this is." He leans in to try and steal another touch.  
"Kissing." Crawly chuckles. "We're kissing, angel." He curls his fingers into Aziraphale's blonde curls. "If we don't stop I'm going to regret it." He leaves little, sweet kisses along his jawline. "Gorgeous...Gorgeous thing... You tempt me like nothing else."

The kissing became more common. Having Crawly in his lap became more common.

None of the archangels mentioned it. None of them came to stop it. Aziraphale chose not to think on that fact all too much.

* * *

"What do you mean you won't fuck him?" Lucifer lounged on his chosen cloud as he so often did. He was quite spoiled by the Almighty and rarely did any actual work. He picks apart a loaf of manna and lets each piece fall to the Firmament.   
"Don't call it that." Crawly's nose curled in distaste. "I don't want to fuck. I want to... It's different. He's special." He rolls onto his stomach and hides his face in a soft patch of cloud. He can feel his entire face go red. Aziraphale was amazing. It wasn't fair that he was stuck on that damned wall.

Lucifer takes to tossing bits of manna onto Crawly's head and back. They're alone for the moment. The others, the ones who also asked questions, were not allowed in this place. "Don't say make love. That's weird."

Crawly peeks up from the cloud. "So what do you call it when you run off with Gabriel?" He quirks his brow and gives a shit-eating grin.  
The morningstar's expression goes cold. "Watch your tongue, little brother."


	10. Chapter 10

"I brought you something."   
Aziraphale braces himself as Crawly lands on his stomach. He'd been happily lounging on his back watching the stars when he'd seen white wings heading toward him. Seeing Crawly at night was a very rare treat. He sits up enough to properly speak to the other angel.

"You've never brought anything." He looks around him curiously. Crawly holds something behind his back with a wide grin.   
"This!" He shows off empty hands.   
"...That's quite cruel, Crawly." He feels familiar disappointment and moves his hands to Crawly's hips to move him away.

"Don't make that face, angel." Crawly drapes himself over Aziraphale's front and nuzzles into his hair. "If you want to see what I've brought you have to come with me. You have to trust me."

He hesitates. He can feel something had changed in the world. "Come with you where?"  
"The garden."

This time he does deposit Crawly onto the wall. He stands quickly and rests a hand on his sword hilt more out of suspicious habit than anything. "You know I can't leave the wall, Crawly. If you are here to be cruel then... then please leave."

"When have I ever been cruel to you?" Crawly steps up to him. He rests his hand on Aziraphale's sword hand. "Trust me. Please?"

* * *

"What is keeping Aziraphale on the wall?" Lucifer stands next to his sisters as they watched the garden from far above the Earth. They are a sight that would blind any human with their shining, resplendent beauty.

Michael shifts her spear from one hand to the other. Even Uriel looks mildly uncomfortable. "Nothing." She replies finally.  
"It is a test devised by the Almighty. Nothing physically keeps the angel on the wall beyond his belief that he must be there." Uriel settles her hands behind her back.

Lucifer pops his tongue. "I see. How...like Her."

* * *

"I can't do this."  
"You can."  
"I cannot do this! I will fall and be injured again or it will burn! The last time I tried it burned!"

They stand at the inner edge of the garden wall. Aziraphale doesn't dare even allow his toes to touch the very edge. He'd made the mistake of reaching for a tall tree once just to feel a leaf and he'd found his hand burned down to the bone that made up their given humanoid bodies. Luckily Crawly had flown down almost at the same moment and gently healed the wound.

"I swear to you." Crawly takes his hands and holds them firmly. "Nothing will happen. Say it, my love."  
Love.   
Oh.

He swallows and finally nods. "I trust you. I... I can do this."

Crawly tips them back and plunge over the side of the wall. He spreads his wings at the last moment and they land with barely a blade of grass bent.

"What is this!" Aziraphale jumps from place to place as the grass tickles his bare feet. "Crawly!"  
The red haired angel cackles with laughter. "It's grass, angel. It's harmless. Hold still, hold still. You'll get used to it." He pulls Aziraphale into his arms and kisses him with a new, unrestrained passion. "You're here. You're in Eden."

Aziraphale leans into him heavily. The grass still tickles his toes and his nose is filled with new smells. The garden smells of life and love and happiness. A small flock of evening birds flies above them and he sees a little trail of ants marching up a tree trunk. "I'm here." He sobs.

It takes time for Aziraphale to come back to himself. Crawly holds his hand as they slowly walk through the forest. They reach a stream and they laugh and hold their robes high as they splash in the water.

"Let me show you what I've brought you." They've stopped in a small clearing of blooming night flowers. The smell is sweet and dizzying. He kisses Aziraphale once and twice and thrice before reluctantly pulling back.

He rubs his palms together and out fly hundreds of little lights. They fly up around them and then disperse among the flowers.

"I'm calling them fireflies." His smile is bashful. "I made them for you."


	11. Chapter 11

"You could change your hair if it pleased you."  
Aziraphale carefully braids fragrant moonflowers into Crawly's long, wavy red hair. He'd showed Aziraphale how a gentle pull would cause the locks to grow and grow until he was pleased with the length.

"Oh no. I'm not so daring. I would look like a sheep!"

Their second evening in the garden is just as magical as the first. Crawly had led him around the garden to touch every plant and animal they could find. His favorite animal had been a massive snake who had slithered over to them to lick around them curiously. It had allowed Aziraphale to stroke its scales before it had climbed up one of the tall, tall trees to meet its mate. In the morning Crawly had brought them back up the wall and had left Aziraphale with a kiss and a promise to return.

A pair of lions had met them in the moonflower meadow. The male had tried to take a bite of Crawly's hair before growing bored and wandering off to eat the sweet flowers that bloomed. It had caused much grumbling and complaining on Crawly's part.

"You would look lovely." Crawly corrected. His head tipped back and he watched as more pieces of the moon were clicked into place. "But you're always gorgeous. Have I told you that? You're more beautiful than all the stars and galaxies combined." His heart twinged. Another piece clicked into place. From across the meadow, the lioness rolled onto her back to find a comfortable position to sleep. Her mate continued to eat and emit low rumbles.

"You're flattering me. I'm sure there are more beautiful angels. I've seen Lucifer in the distance. He's much more beautiful than I am." Aziraphale finishes the braid and then pulls Crawly back against his chest. He nuzzles his nose into his neck and breathes deeply.

"Lucifer is a pompous ass." He chuckles. He rests his hands over the ones that fold over his thin waist. "But also a fine friend. You could meet him, you know. You could come with me. You've never touched the clouds before. They're very soft."

Unfortunately, Aziraphale doesn't take the bait. "I'm meant to me here. I...I think I am allowed in the garden. I haven't been punished yet, but I know I can't leave. I'm meant to guard the gate."

Crawly curls his fingers into Aziraphale's. "Angel, there is no gate. Haven't you noticed? The garden has no gate. It's just a never ending wall."

Aziraphale's breathing stops. He sits up, head shaking. "No. No. That's not true. There is a gate. I protect it. There must be a gate."

The final piece of the moon clicks into place. The moonflowers bloom as the moon shines its light for the first time. 

* * *

"The cunt is knocked up." Lucifer snarls. He throws a loaf of manna against the Firmament. "She gave those fucking animals another gift! First a mate and now this? How many of them will there be, hm? Tell me!"

Gabriel flinches away from his brother. Lucifer's golden hair stands nearly on end in his rage. It looks almost like a halo. "Don't call them that, brother. She loves them and She loves us. They are made in Her image and so we must love them."

Lucifer slams Gabriel against the Firmament as if he were nothing more than another loaf of manna. "Do not give me your bullshit, Gabriel. I will not love them. I am Her favorite! She is supposed to love me the most! She gives those things all of Her attention. She forces us to work for their pleasure!" His brown eyes a blown wide with fury. "Stop crying! I said stop crying!"

* * *

"I think it's wonderful." Aziraphale sighs. He swings his feet as he watches the garden under him. He doesn't dare enter it without Crawly, but now he doesn't fear to let his feet dangle. He isn't afraid to reach out and touch leaves that are within his grasp. He gentle shoos birds back to their place instead of killing them. He doesn't think he could stomach it anymore.

He smiles up at the sky. "Really, I do. She's a lovely mate. We have the same hair! Well, mine is quite a bit paler." He isn't sure if anyone is listening, but he had spent so much time alone that talking aloud was as normal as breathing. "They seem very happy. Adam looked lonely for so long. One can only be alone for so long." He plays with the folds of his robes.

"Thank you for sending me a friend. I never knew how alone I was until he came. I never knew... How sad being alone could be." His smile turns a little fonder. "I think I'm in love. I'm not sure what that means, really. I love everything in the garden, but this is special. I never would have felt this if you hadn't sent him to me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> According to Genesis, all animals ate plants before Eve ate the apple.


	12. Chapter 12

"You must decide where your loyalties lie." Michael stands before him in a simple robe lined with gold and silver. She will never not be intimidating. Her hair is carefully plaited down her back and wrapped in ruby red string.

"Must I?" He asks. He plays with a ball of light in his hands. It's far too small to ever be a star. "Why must there be two sides?"

She rolls her eyes. The ball of light is knocked out of his hands. It skitters across the Firmament and then falls through the clouds toward the ground. "You have three sides to choose from, don't you?" She jerks her head and they watch as the ball slams into the wall of Eden.

His eyes go wide. He feels his breathing stop. "I have to help him."  
Michael pinches the bridge of her nose. "Go then. Think of what I've said. I beg you."

* * *

"Oh my. Oh no. No no."

He had seen the light in the night's sky but had foolishly assumed it was a normal shooting star. Crawly had kindly explained that shooting stars were usually debris from building space. They were supposed to be harmless though he'd once seen one land miles and miles away in the endless desert.

This star had broken the stone of one of the straighter parts of the wall. Several bricks had fallen into the and he was trying desperately to put them back into place.

"Aziraphale!"

He yelps as a stone lands on his foot. The delicate bones break on impact and he falls back into the sand with tears in his eyes. A few more stones fall from the wall.

The angel before him is tall with hair red like fire. His eyes are wide and yellow and subtly glow in the darkness. His robes are white and are embroidered in swirling, rainbow threads. Even his wings seem to emit light.

"Oh shit. Let me help you." The angel knees next to him and hovers his hand over the crushed foot. It heals slowly, but he feels no pain.  
"A-Archangel Raphael?" He stammers. He has never met the fourth archangel. Always too busy in the stars, Crawly had told him.

He receives a nod in reply. Raphael strokes his curls gently.  
"I'm glad you're okay. I'm so sorry. I dropped the star and didn't think to catch it. I'll fix the wall for you."

Aziraphale grabs his sleeve. His heart thuds hard in his chest. The aura is stronger, but he knows it. "Crawly?"

Behind them, the male lion pokes his head out of the hole in the wall. It takes its first steps onto the endless desert sands. As it disappears over the horizon Raphael kisses Aziraphale. 


	13. Chapter 13

The bricks are pushed back into place as if nothing has happened. The sand and stone are wiped clean. They sit together with toes buried in the still sun-warmed sand.

Raphael holds Aziraphael's hand tightly in his own. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to," he lets out a tired breath, "feel forced. I wanted to be your friend if you wanted to be mine." He rests his hand on Aziraphael's shoulder and luxuriates in the feel of sword rough hands in his hair. He looks like Crawly again with his long mahogany hair and simple robes.

"You're an archangel. I should have noticed. None of the others come down here. They just fly past." Aziraphale whispers. "But you... Pitied me. You pitied me." His tone turns into an accusation. He roughly pushes Raphael from his shoulder. He scrabbles to his feet and releases all six wings. The archangel could easily smite him, but he feels a mix of sadness and rage and absolute heartbreak. "That's why you kept coming here!"

Raphael grunts when he hits the sand. He stands much more slowly. His wings press against his back as Aziraphale's stretch out. "I pitied you." He agrees. "Trapped here with no company. Too afraid to leave a wall that has no entrance or exit. What are you guarding? Why?" He steps toward Aziraphale. "And then you smiled, angel. You smiled and you made me fall in love with you."

"You... Love me?" His wings low slowly and one by one he is left with two wings that hang low.

Raphael runs his hand down his face. He laughs hollowly. "I do. Aziraphale, I love you more than I love Her." He looks up at the stars.

* * *

"We will attack." Lucifer sits ramrod straight as he speaks to the massive gathering of angels before him. At his side, Raphael stands uncomfortably slouched over. "She wants us to love those animals. She wants us to worship them. No more! No more being told what we can and can't do! No more arbitrary rules!" His hair curls around his body like flames. "We will fight and we will overcome her and her little pets."

The angels around them cheer and scream and chant for blood, blood, blood.

Raphael tips back and falls through the Firmament. His wings carry him to Eden before he can think. 

* * *

"I love you." He strokes Aziraphale's cheek with all the love he's ever put into building his stars. "I love you so much, Aziraphale. Do you understand me?" His angel looks confused.

"Of course I understand. I love you as well. Why...Why are you crying?"He hates to hear the fear in his voice. He can't heal fear.

"Something is about to happen. Something we won't understand. We may never understand it." He can already feel it tugging at his very being. He pulls Aziraphael into his arms and presses his nose into those soft curls. His angel always smells like sunlight. "My brother is a fool."

"Raphael. Please. Why are you crying? What are you talking about?" Aziraphale clings to his rainbow robes and shakes him slightly. "Please! You're scaring me!"

* * *

"What is it?" Aziraphale turns the orb in his hand around and around curiously. It's bright red and shines in the bright sunlight.

"I don't know," Crawly admits. "Adam hasn't named it. I found it growing on a tree. There were other colors, but I liked that one. I've seen Adam put them in his mouth." He takes the orb back and insects it himself. He gives it a curious sniff.

"It's not manna. We shouldn't put it in our mouths." Aziraphale decides. "It could be dangerous to us!"

Crawly considers it. "Or it could be harmless." He presses the orb to his mouth and takes a bite. The orb is firm and sweet and juice spills down his chin. He laughs as he chews. It's the most delicious thing he's ever tasted. "You have to try it!" He wipes his mouth on the back of his hand.

Aziraphale hesitates. He takes the orb and smells the white flesh that has been revealed. "One bite can't hurt, can it?" He bites down over Crawly's bite. His eyes roll back in his head and he moans. 

* * *

A horn sounds above them. Aziraphale's sword suddenly flickers to life. The flames drip onto the wall and leave black soot stains there.

"I have to go." He stares at the sky. "I have to go." He repeats as if mesmerized.

Raphael chokes back a sob. "We will never see each other again, Aziraphale. This is it. I can feel it. I've...I've fucked up."

The blonde angel turns his attention back to him after a moment. "Aren't you coming? You must feel it. We have to go up there. We have to... We have to guard the gate." He smiles. "We can do it together. I love you and you love me. She loves love! We'll be fine."

"Oh...My sweet angel." He presses their foreheads together. "My brother is an idiot. I've been an idiot for listening to him." The pull is stronger. He needs to go. He has to go. "Forget me. Forget me, Aziraphale. You all will." It's more a command than a request.

Aziraphale's expression goes from hopeful to hurt to confused. Then he smiles wide at Raphael. "I'm sorry to be rude, but I need to go." He points to the sky vaguely. There are flames falling from the sky, but they are not shooting stars. "It was nice to meet you..." His brows furrow. "It was nice to meet you." He steps away and spreads his wings. For the first time, Aziraphale is allowed into Heaven.

* * *

Aziraphale spreads his great white wing and the demon stoops under it. He was worried the sky-water would hurt him, but it seemed harmless. Still, it felt natural to be so close to his hereditary enemy.

The War had been brutal. He'd been injured and had injured many of those who followed the rebellious morningstar. Then, as quickly as it had begun, Lucifer was struck down and his ten million followers were ripped from Heaven. Aziraphale was given a ring as a medal of honor and he found himself back on the wall.

"How did you get through, if you don't mind my asking?" He feels guilty at failing in his duty and yet somewhere deep, deep inside it feels right. No creature should be trapped like Adam and Even had been.

"Crack in the wall. Some of the bricks were loose. It's where those two got out, actually." Crawly gestures to where Adam and Even had wandered off. The corpse of a lion lays in the sand. Its red blood is slowly washed away by the rain.

"Ah... Yes. I had meant to patch that properly." Aziraphale sighs. "But...I suppose what's done is done." He glances over at Crawly. "It's strange, but I feel like I know you."

Crawly blinks at him and smiles rakishly. "I had the same feeling. I was a star builder. We would have never met."

They stand together until the rain comes to a stop. In about six thousand years they will kiss for the first time as Aziraphale and Crowley. It will rain and they will laugh. For now, they stand together as enemies taking in the sight of a new world.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr](unbreakable-groundriot.tumblr.com/). My kofi link may or may not be there. 😉 Every comment is appreciated and I try to reply to them all no matter how small!


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